MOOCHACHO
by MOOKAGE
Summary: WARNING: No Plot :D  Rated for language, alcohol, suggestive themes, and future chapters. Multiple pairings, mainly TWINCEST! Not for the kiddies! :o
1. Background Info and Other Stuff

**The title was the result of our lack of knowing any other possible title so, BAH!**

We are special. Give us things.

**You Must Read This to Understand the Story!**

Okay dudes! Haha, this "story" is kind of hard to explain. It started out as a simple random AIM convesation between Stephie & I. (We're pretty awesome people, lol. I'm Mika and she's Yue--kind of explains our screennames.) Then, it amazingly turned from retarded scenes, to a love story! (O.o) Yeah, I hate the MikaxLuci pairings but I think I was high off of grape juice that night... and morning. We were up from 2-6AM talking to each other on AIM--or "making the accidental story) There are also two different styles to it, so I guess I should tell you who was typing as who. Finally, Stephie and I are pretty "special" people... lol. So, if you're not accustomed to our unique sense of humor, you really shouldn't be reading this story. Also, we are adding on to the story so this is only the first chapater. (And it's still not even all of what we typed that morning...)

**THIS IS ALL FICTION!** Half the stuff in here about the characters and stuff are all fictional and a result of me and Stephie's lack of sleep. Don't get mad at me because we totally made the characters OOC. Do you know how hard it was for me to make Michael l-l-love Lucifer?! -choke- (...even if it was hott...)

**DISCLAIMER:** We don't own Angel Sanctuary, but Kaori Yuki's the best thing that ever happened to me! xD

**Stephie-poo (Katou-baka-sama) My name for her...:**

Herself, Katou, Kira/Lucifer, Raphael, Sara

**Mandy-moo (Mika-sama):**

Myself, Arakune, Michael, Raziel, Setsuna (Except for one part of the story)

WELL YOU PROBABLY WANT TO GET ON WITH THE STORY NOW, RIGHT?! WELL CLICKY CHAPTER ONE ALREADY!! (READ&REVIEW PLEASE!) -Note: This is originally an AIM convo, don't bring out our grammar or format or anything stupid like that.

Some smileys don't show up... smiley haters.

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**KATOU-BAKA-SAMA**

Birthday: October 5, Libra

**Favorites**

Color: Pink

Food: Fettucini Alfredo

Quote: "Moochacho." and "Yo."

Manga: Angel Sanctuary

Story Genre: Tradgedy, Murder/Mystery, Comedy

Angel Sanctuary Character: Lucifer

**MIKA-SAMA**

Birthday: January 30, Aquarius

**Favorites**

Color: Black

Food: Seafood, Pasta Dishes

Phrase: "HOLY SHIT!" and "Vagabond."

Manga: Death Note and anything by Kaori Yuki

Story Genre: Murder/Mystery, Romance/Drama, Parody

Angel Sanctuary Character: Michael


	2. C1: Pot, Floods, and Sales

**Chapter 1: Pot, Floods, and Sales**

**Michael:** Dude man.

**Katou:** WEED?

**Katou:** oh,, no. its just Mika

**Katou:** HI!

**Michael:** -.-

**Michael:** Disapointed?

**Michael:** lol

**Michael:** So, smoke any good pot today?

**Katou:** pot!

**Katou:** where?

**Katou:** pot?

**Katou:** what?

**Michael:** ...

**Michael:** (smacks him on the head with a pot) There :/

**Katou:** (falls)

**Katou:** ...

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** .

**Katou:** (sits up) dude... where am I? its like pot leaves are... everywhere...

**Katou:** is this heaven?

**Michael:** (blank stare) ...Yea... hey Kira, wanna toy?!!!

**Katou:** I AM IN HEAVEN!

**Michael:** (sighs and smacks again, dragging the brain-dead blonde to Kira's house--wherever that is)

**Michael:** KNOCK KNOCK, HO!

**Michael:** >/

**Katou:** huh?

**Michael:** DAMMIT! STAY DOWN! (hits him again)

**Michael:** Kira won't frikin' answer his damn door... (mumbles)

**Katou:** huh?

**Michael:** ...

(This part is only funny to those that can actually see the chat in it's unmodified form! Since we don't want our brizznus open for the world to see, you can see this part only unmodified at my homepage. DON'T READ UNTIL YOU HAVE SEEN IT! Or the funny is ruined... you funny ruiner.)

**Unknown:** (opens up) em.. hi?

**Michael:** WTF?

**Michael:** Sara Mudo?!

**Unknown:** Very funny Michael. its Kira.

**Michael:** HOLY SHIT! I was just talking to Sara and she had that same color! (Happened earlier in the chat and I couldn't fit it in the storyline, but I'm planning on adding it as a bonus-chapter.)

**Kira:** oh well I like pink...

**Kira:** it goes good with my eyes.

**Michael:** O.e

**Kira:** and... my ...weee--

**Michael:** (throws Katou at him) Here... I'm gonna go throw-up from that bit of info...

**Kira:** KATOU!

**Kira:** BABY!

**Kira:** ARE YOU OKAY?

**Michael:** Hehe... (outside looking at stones)

**Katou:** HEAVEN!

**Katou:** SEX ME WITH YOUR STICK OF LIFE!

**Michael:** (throws a rock at Kira's window) Sukah! (runs away)

**Kira:** ...

**Unknown:** (in a really gay voice) Hiya!

**Kira:** (getting pissed at all these bitches up in his crib) & WHO YOU BE?

**Unknown:** Oh, I was just noticing your broken window--and by the way some glass got in my eye (ouch)--and I just noticed this happened to be your house!!! Remember me sweetie? It's Arakune:3

**Kira:** (throws Katou down some stairs) uhhhh no... I never sucked your dick twice in one night I swear.

**Kira:** ... :)

**Arakune:** :/

**Arakune:** Why'd you just throw someone down the stairs to your one-floor trailer home?

**Kira:** he's... in my...

**Kira:** toliet

**Kira:** yeah

**Kira:** toilet

**Arakune:** ...

**Arakune: **So... you busy?

**Kira:** actually yes. I was just about to take a LONNNNG nap.

**Kira:** come back in about 10 minutes...

**Kira:** I'm a quick cummer!

**Kira:** I mean... I gotta clean.

**Michael:** (throws a brick at Kira's toilet, causing a killer-random-flood) Haha, losers!

**Katou:** HEAVEN HAS WATER?!

**Kira:** OMG! SKEET IS IN THE WATER!

**Oh, who now?!:** (randomly appears a Kira's doorstep) Hi there! I'm Raziel, Zaphikel's bitch--I mean assistant. Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies:)

**Kira:** deez

**Kira:** nutz

**Kira:** haha

**Raziel:** Hm (tilts head) Well, we do have coconut cookies...

**Katou:** HEAVEN HAS COOKIES?!!?!?

**Kira:** hm? well do these cookies contain skeet?

**Raziel:** Yes! My own!--er--I mean no added preservatives, sir. :) (more cheesy smiles)

**Katou:** HEAVEN HAS SKEET!?!?!

**Michael:** DAMMIT KATOU! SHUT THE HELL UP! (randomly appears to throw a brick at him)

**Kira:** I only like my own skeet... sorry. (slams door)

**Michael:** EAT THIS! (slams Katou against the wall and hits him with the brick) That'll teach you to keep coming back...

**Michael:** Hmph.

**Katou:** HEAVEN HAS BRICKS?!?!

**Arakune:** Well, are we still going to have sex:/

**Michael:** YOU PEOPLE ARE MADD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND KATOU?! WHY AREN'T YOU DEAD YET?!

**Kira:** ONLY if your up for a 3-some..

**Michael:** Gross! You're nasty! And that THING has a pennis, I mean penis! I'm leaving... cya.

**Kira:** WAIT! YOU CAN JOIN...

**Kira:** if you want.

**Raziel:** Excuse me, sir! (peers through the broken window) I also sell lubricated condoms. :)

**Kira:** nahh, I like it ruff in my ass.

**Kira:** thank you though.

**Kira:** (closes door)

**Raziel:** Well... I'm still here. I was looking through the broken window... remember? I also sell brain-enhancers.

**Kira:** GET THE FUCK AWAY BITCH!

**Kira:** I DON'T WANT NONE OF YOUR SHIT!

**Kira:** GO FUCK A NUT

**Michael:** (snuck in through the back door to steal some food) What the shit? Blue sandwiches? O.e Gross... (runs away before he gets caught)

**Raziel:** Well... T.T

**Raziel:** I must sell my items, or Zaphikel won't love me anymore...

**Kira:** HAHA, so what bitch?

**Kira:** go fuck a nut!

**Kira:** byeee!

**Raziel:** You can't close a broken window...

**Michael:** (laughing while eating the... blue food) HAHA, HE'S RIGHT!

**Michael:** Oh shit... (runs away again)

**Kira:** COME BACK HERE! FIGHT LIKE YOU HAVE A DICK YOU PUSSY!

**Raziel:** How'd you know?! O.o Oh, and I was sort of standing here the whole time... -- About those brain-enhancers...

**Michael:** (from a tree) _Uh, wasn't he talking about me...?_

**Kira:** LISTEN HOE! MY BRAIN IS FINE!

**Raziel:** Well, if that is what fine is to you...

**Katou:** dude... no its not... I fucked you too hard last time

**Unknown... 4:** HELLLO!

**END OF CHAPTER ONE**

**Moo:** Yupp! That's the end of it! Hang tight folks, the "fun" doesn't begin until later. x3 Hey Stephie, we didn't show ourselves in this on yet, did we:/

**Stephie:** uhh, no we didn't; I'm the action next chapter... I get to fuck Luc---- I won't spoil it :)

**Moo:** Yeah, great for not spoiling. -.-;

**Stephie:** ... I only gave 3 letters..

**Stephie:** it could be... I love Lucy or some shit

**Moo:** Fer sure... he's kinda on the characters list. ..

**Stephie:** ...oh

**Stephie:** well.

**Stephie:** okay :)

**Raziel:** Hello authoresses! Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?

**Stephie:** fuck yeahhhhh

**Stephie:** I want the one withOUT skeet thou.

**Raziel:** (tilts head) Without? .-.

**Moo: **Er...

**Stephie:** fuck you thennnn

**Stephie:** I don't want SKEET in my god damned cookies

**Moo:** Haha, idk... it _is _Raziel...

**Stephie:** damn , fucker selling me skeet cookies.

**Moo:** Well then... maybe we should just save your skeet chronicles for our chapter two ending. :/

**Stephie:** fersuree

**EXTRA CHAPTERS & BONUS ENDINGS SOON TO BE RELEASED:** Unmodified versions of the chat (which are _wayy_ funnier...), Enter the world of the crazy authoresses, other stupid stuff you probably don't care about.


	3. C2: Are They the Peanut Butter Ones?

Sorry, dudes. I got caught up playing "Tales of Symphonia" _again_... Hey, has anyone seen the uber-awesome OVA? I've only seen the first installment, but people, the fighting scenes are FRIK'N AWESOME! Kratos kicked major ass, not that he already doesn't. (Hehe)

So anyway, I know Chapters 1-11 were already pre-made on that retarded night sometime in June, but it takes a damn long while to edit them! Also, no Stephie at the end of this chapter. I haven't talked to her in awhile because of her dad... Oh, the misery. We should be able to talk again by the end of July, which is probably when I'll release Chapter 3. (Sorry) In the meanwhile, I'll try to do a little solo-work with one-shots. (I'm no good at multi-chapters, I can't keep up with updating, lol) Unless someone wants to do a story with me. Don't worry people, I'm real good at things besides chat-fics and such.

**Awesome List** (Chapter 1):

Mitsuko Soma, for sharing a wicked sense of humor and reviewing chapter one.

Lil' Miss Spookiness, for adding our story to her favorites... AND HAVING AN **L** ICON! OMG, YOU REALLY ROCK! ... (cough)

* * *

**Chapter 2: Are They the Peanut Butter Ones?**

**Michael:** HOLY SHIT! Purple condoms? O.o Dammit! How do I keep coming back here?! (hides under bed before Kira realizes he stole half his food)

**Katou:** (STARTS JACKING OFF)

**Katou:** ---NEAR MICHAEL

**Raziel:** O.e

**Michael:** O.e

**Michael:** (scoots away quietly)

**Raziel:** Oh my...

**Katou:** (MOANS) KIRA CUM HELP ME!

**Kira:** YES BABY.

**Kira:** JACK MINE TOO!

**Michael:** O.e (holds his mouth shut from throwing up and blowing his cover)

**Michael:** X.x

**Kira:** HARDER!

**Katou:** I'M GUNNA CUM!!

**Michael:** _What...the...shit...?_

**Katou:** UGH!

**Michael:** _The hell am I watching?!_

**Kira:** UGHHH I'M CUMMING; I'M CUMMING...

**Kira:** UGH I CAMEEE

**Michael: **_That's it!_ (runs from under the bed) YOUR FOOD WAS BLUE ANYWAYS!!! (cries from the bad thoughts) T.T Hold me brother, hold meeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!! (still crying)

**That Same Unknown from the End of Chapter One:** ANYONE CALL ME?!

**Katou:** HEAVEN HAS LUCIFER?!

**Raziel:** Hello Lucifer! Would you like some Girl Scouts cookies?

**Lucifer:** (SQUEELS FROM EXCITEMENT) OOOOH! ARE THEY THE PEANUT BUTTER ONES?!!?!

**Raziel:** Why yes!

**Lucifer:** 10 BOXES!

**Raziel:** Okie Dokie! Only 67.99 a cookie.

**Lucifer:** wtf

**Lucifer:** no

**Lucifer:** bitch

**Lucifer:** I will take out homeboyyy

**Raziel:** What I meant to say was one cent a box!

**Lucifer:** How about they're fucken free,

**Lucifer:** or you die.

**Raziel:** Here!!! 10 boxes!!!

**Lucifer:** (smiles) THAT'S what I_ thought._

**Raziel:** -.- (sighs and hands the cookies over to the devil) Off to make more...

**Lucifer:** (opens box of cookies) Hmm? Odd smell.

**Michael:** DA FUCK?! (strangely recovered) YOU BITCH! WHAT'CHU DOING IN MY TERRITORIALS... UH... TERRITORY.

**Lucifer:** **YOU** SPOKE OF ME!

**Michael:** NU UH YOU VAGAMAN! I SAID C-COLD...ME...UH...MOTHER...(?)

**Lucifer:** NO... I SAW YOU WATCHING KATOU & ME-- UHH KIRA jack off.

**Stephie:** lmao

**Michael:** Y-YY-Y-YOU?!!!!!!! OH.MY.SHIT! EW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT WAS _YOUR_ PENIAL... UH I MEAN PENIS?

**Lucifer:** ... -.-

**END OF CHAPTER TWO**

**Moo:** Well... that's the end of Chapter Two! It was short and not my favorite. I personally can't wait to release Chapter 4 and 5.

**Michael:** RAWR!

**Moo:** Uhh... I didn't think you'd be doing end of chapter commentary, Mika-kun.

**Michael:** Yea, well the retar--er Steph isn't here, so I, the AWESOME Michael-sama, is replacing her.

**Moo:** Michael... you do know this is a one chapter deal. Steph should be back by Chapter Three. You're not replacing anyone.

**Michael:** I'M NOT?!

**Moo:** ...

**NEXT CHAPTER IS:** Can't give the title away, sooo... STEPH LIKES FRUIT LOOPS!!!


	4. NOT A CHAPTER: Those That Want to IM Us

No, this is not a chapter, but we figured it'd be too big to squeeze in as an intro to a chapter.

**What if You Want to IM Our Author/Private AIM Screenames?**

Well you can, with exception. Originally our screenames were to keep stupid mofos from IMing us when we wanted to just talk to each other. We value our friendship higher than our others, yes. You may only IM the screenames: **MIKAxPWNSxKATOU** or **Katou x Vagabond** for these reasons:

- To get to know the authoresses.

- Advice. (_ADVICE_, we will NOT change our methods)

- Any kind of question. (Involving the story/us)

- Play a character in the story.

- Ideas.

- Discuss Angel Sanctuary. (Silly and/or Serious)

We will block you if you're IMing us for any other reasons than those. We LOVE our fans, so we'll happily talk to you about anything with our public screenames. :)

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Here are our public screenames for those that just wanna talk:

MOOKAGE (Michael-sama) Stephiiiex3 (Katou-baka-sama)

(MOOKAGE is never really online, so she'll talk to you on MIKAxPWNSxSAMA if she's not working on the story with Katou, or just talking to her)

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Thank you for reading and Chapter 3 will be up on, or earlier, than the end of July 25, 2007. 


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